For many husbands, Money is not only about the numbers It is related to power, security and personal identity. For some, it comes to secrets.
new reconnaissance From Bankate.com it was found that 40 % of adults in the United States with a living partner committed or committed Financial betrayal. Young generations were more likely Keep the secrets of the money: 67 % of General Zires said that they confessed at least one case of financial betrayal, followed by the millennial generation, by 54 %.
What kind of things are Hide? Thirty percent The spending of more than their husband or partner will be greatAnd 23 % I paid debts Their partner has no knowledge. Others maintain secret credit accounts or savings.
Avigail Lev, founder and director of secrets, says not necessarily financial betrayal. Gulf Center CBT. “The choice to be special about a place and how your money is just privacy,” she said.
But “there are agreements with your partner about how you use money and hide them – hide it intentionally, lying or deception, this is a financial betrayal.”
Money is one of the main reasons for divorce, but often couples are still struggling to communicate publicly about financial affairs. “Many husbands do not explain their history and financial beliefs, which leads to misunderstanding and resentment. Melissa Murphy Buffon, a certified and founding financial plan for its founder, such as emotional or physical betrayal,” said without an open dialogue, secrets and financial betrayals can erode Divorce partners.
With a lot at stake, money should not be a subject of taboos. Why can’t people be straight with each other around money? How can the couples prevent money from destroying their relationship, and how can they move forward when one breaks confidence?
Why do financial betrayal happen
Why will the person who loves you deeply will be honest about money? The respondents in the survey said they mainly want financial privacy or control of their financial resources. Some did not want to share money, and others said they were embarrassed to manage their money.
Kevin Shahnazari, CEO of Finlywealth.
“Sometimes it comes to guilt or fear-anxiety that his partner will not agree to a specific purchase, or that the old financial error may scare them,” said Emily Locke, a certified financial plan and a co-founder of it. a lotA tool for money management. “At other times, it is a way to avoid conflict or maintain peace. If one of the partners is concerned about judging the shopping habit, for example, they may think it is easier to hide credit card data rather than a difficult conversation.”
“People cannot be honest with money because honesty offers them to weaknesses.”
There can be differences in husbands and values of husbands: one is a competitor, and the other is savings. But the money can also take the form of strength, control, safety, previous financial shock, even the issue of mental health, drug use or gambling disorder. Institute for Financial Conflict Resolution.
Her customers are full of stories. “One of the partners bought a set of clothes, but he concealed the evidence because the couple had agreed to do a month” no purchase “, another partner who supported a former partner without revealing it with miles when it was already purchased directly.”
How to maintain money problems in the Gulf
Communication is the key In a relationship, especially when it comes to financing. Lisa Atkinson, a financial advisor with Federal Credit Federation, ToxonThe husbands say it should embrace transparency. “Table of regular funds discussions in a quiet preparation free from the ruling. Or specify the date of a preliminary meeting with a financial advisor.”
Create an environment without championship It makes it easy to address issues. “Equivalent to financial talks with sympathy, instead of accusations, to encourage honesty.”
Setting a joint financial plan. “Create common goals and budgets that both partners contribute to their review.” It is important that both parties feel comfortable. “
Collective work makes the dream work. The use of financial tools together – budget applications, common proliferation papers and common accounts – can help enhance transparency.
I have discovered financial betrayal, what now?
When trust is betrayed, there are bruises. In the Bankrase Survey, 38 % of adults said they believe that maintaining financial secrets from a bad partner like physical fraud, and 7 % say it is worse.
But there is a way to rebuild confidence, says Pavon. “Developing marital infidelity requires openness and patience, and perhaps even professional guidance.”
Getting the same page is necessary for the success of the couple. “The more financial couples face financial fears, the stronger their relationship,” Pavon said.
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