One day every year, in the depths of winter, Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania, becomes the center of the weather world. Thousands will gather at Gobblers Knob to wait for the world’s most famous meteorologist to emerge from his den and predict how long we will have to wait until spring.
Punxsutawney Phil, the forecaster, has been officially predicting the end of winter in “Punxy” (with varying degrees of accuracy) since the 1880s when the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club was formed. Over the years, Phil has become somewhat of a celebrity. He even has his own fan club, which calls itself “Phil Phans”. Parties, banquets and balls will be held in the days surrounding Groundhog Day to honor the weather-predicting rodent.
Not everyone is a “feel van”; PETA’s Deadly Fun is, as it does every year, taking issue with the Punxsutawney Ground Hog Club. They claim that the Seer of Wrath is being held against his will and must be released.
Groundhog Day is approaching, which means PETA is once again pushing for Punxsutawney Phil’s retirement. This year they are offering to replace the groundhog with a gender reveal-style vegan cake. https://t.co/A7yZvl0HBS
– KDKA (@KDKA) January 22, 2025
In a letter sent to the president of the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club, they had the audacity to question the validity of Phil’s mysterious meteorological powers.
“If you don’t like this idea, Icing on the cake Is that we have another offer: We would be happy to send you a large thermometer for Gobbler’s Knob instead that reads, “If it’s still cold, it’s still winter,” which aptly represents the absurdity of this tired old thing’s current form. scene. “We look forward to hearing from you, as always,” Peta wrote.
Large thermometers and vegan cake? PETA hasn’t come up with anything stupid since last year when it proposed flipping a giant coin.
PETA insists they are working for the groundhogs and that Phil would be better off living outside in the cold.
Refer Phil to a reputable retreat with his family, and each year we’ll give away a giant “weather reveal” vegan cake (a world’s first this year) to share with revelers at Gobbler’s Knob. If the inside of the cake is blue, there will be six more weeks of winter. If it is pink, there will be an early spring. This will allow you to continue making tourist dough while showing a slice of decency to an elephant. It would be at least as accurate as asking a groundhog what to expect in a way that doesn’t even reflect his nature.
Currently, when Phil isn’t working one day a year, the hulking weatherman spends his days at the Punxsutawney Library. He may not be able to leave his den and roam freely in the pristine forests of central Pennsylvania, but his life is also free from coyotes, lynxes, birds of prey and other predators. Seems like a fair trade for a day’s work.
Phil is the world’s most pampered groundhog.
🙄
– No BeAJagoff (@Eponine1973) January 22, 2025
No one in Punxy is likely to take PETA’s offer seriously, and Phil will continue his pampered lifestyle unless we get six more weeks of winter.
Groundhog tastes like chicken
-Gary M. Mr. Nawalot (@mrknowalot2023) January 22, 2025
Act accordingly, Phil.
cake??? pic.twitter.com/m9P2XWaqEr
– Jim Livengood (@JimLivengood) January 22, 2025
The vegan cake is the most laughable part of PETA’s stupid idea. Vegans in Punxsutawney are like Bigfoot. There have been rumors of sightings, but no scientific evidence that they actually exist.
I believe that the older, more respectable community will continue to protect Phil, at the expense of PETA’s futile endeavors.
– Doug Freshkorn (@Llamadougfresh) January 22, 2025
Phil’s future and Groundhog Day traditions are safe in Punxsutawney. The people there are the perfect representation of small town America. They hunt, fish, and enjoy the outdoors.
PETA may be the only thing the people at Punxy love less than vegan cake.
